*By ‘everyone’, I mean Wes, Megan, new Jack, Adam, Josh… I’m sure there’s more but I can’t keep up.
Aside from ‘loyal’, ‘you know me babe’ and ‘I’ve got a text’, one of the most common phrases from this year’s Love Island is, ‘Yeah I’m happy, but could I be happier?’
Let’s take a trip down memory lane…
It all started when Wes ended things with Laura because he felt like he could be ‘happier’ with Megan. He insisted he was happy with Laura, but ultimately felt that he wanted more.
Adam (remember him?) was pretty much on the same page. He was happy with Kendall, but thought he could be happier with Rosie. Then he chanced his arm with Megan, thinking he might be even happier with her. When that failed, he went back to Rosie but then ditched her for Zara. He actually seemed to be very happy with Zara (and has since said he loves her), but when she was voted out, he didn’t leave and said he’d give things a try with new girl Darylle. They both got voted out, and now he’s back with Zara. All in the space of four (?) weeks.
Let’s not forget Georgia and Josh (how could we?). They were loved up and happy for over two weeks, and Josh even promised he’d never hurt her. Then he got shipped off to Casa Amor and within hours he was sleeping in a bed with new girl Kaz (or is it Kez? Cassie?) while G slept on the day bed with Dani.
Most recently there’s new Jack, who felt he could be happier with new Laura rather than old Laura (side note: why are there only a total of 10 names in the UK?!). Wes encouraged him and said he could and after much thought and consideration (aka not a lot) he finished things with old Laura in pursuit of more happiness with new Laura.
All caught up? Good.
While it all might seem well and good on a reality show jumping from relationship to relationship in search of something better, in the real world it’s pretty problematic. Take these tweets, for example…
This whole ‘I’m happy but I could be happier’ thing is toxic af and I hope everyone watching who thinks it’s a good idea realises it will end with you old and lonely having pushed away everyone decent because you erroneously think you can do better #LoveIsland
— Yazzy Saz (@YazzySaz88) July 17, 2018
Imagine if girls were prone to this ‘I’m happy but I could be happier’ 🤣🤣🤣 Soooo many relationships would end. THE GRASS ISNT ALWAYS GREENER X #LoveIsland
— Savannah (@savannahcoull) July 17, 2018
Right this whole “I’m happy but I could be happier with someone else” line is pissing me off. If everyone had that mentality no one in this world would have settled. #LoveIsland
— Klea🦋 (@klezerr) July 17, 2018
Admitting that you’re happy in a relationship but wondering if you could be happier ultimately means that you’ll constantly be looking for more. Like when you promise yourself you’ll only eat one M&S cookie but end up eating the whole bag. While they were delicious, you realise that the first one was enough and you feel a bit sick after eating them all and wish you didn’t. Does that make sense?
There’s a difference between knowing you’re unhappy in a relationship and wondering if you could he happier. Realistically, we all could be happier in most aspects of our lives. Yeah, we could be ‘happier’ in a better job, in a bigger house, if we drove a better car – but that doesn’t mean you just quit your job, take out a huge loan for a new house and a new car. You make the best of what you have, because at the end of the day it’s yours.
We all know that the grass always seems greener on the other side, and the same applies to relationships. What’s worth having doesn’t come easy – that’s a fact. If we all just jumped ship every time we thought we could be happier, no one would probably ever get married and long-term relationships would be rare.
If you think you could be happier in your relationship, then work on it! Look at the areas you feel need improving, talk about them with your partner and work on them together. Relationships are tough, but what makes a couple strong is going through the tough times together and not being tempted by every half-attractive looking person that comes your way because you’re content and confident with what you have.
Yeah, looking to improve our lives and better ourselves and relationships is great – it’s what makes us grow. But the answer doesn’t always lie somewhere else or with someone else. It’s usually within ourselves (man, this got deep.) By always searching for happiness and being happier through other people, we’ll never be happy. In reality, the only person who can make us ‘happier’ is ourselves.
And, hey, what’s wrong with ‘just’ being happy? That’s a pretty big achievement in itself. So here’s to being happy, working on ourselves and our relationships and appreciating that what we’ve got is pretty damn good. Now, I’m off to eat a cookie.